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Reading: Microsoft to offer public 65 Cents a Share amid Coronavirus bout
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Microsoft to offer public 65 Cents a Share amid Coronavirus bout

GEEK DESK
GEEK DESK
Apr 1
Microsoft building

There’s that word again. Amid. Most popular when used alongside Coronavirus.

It’s a topic that’s become all too familiar. The number of cases have surpassed 800,000 and many have lost their lives.

Self isolating

One message that has come through most governments is that people must stay at home to save lives. You may not be at risk, but there are people around you that are. So do the right thing. Put your sweatpants on, sit in your favourite chair, and wait. Don’t visit anyone. Don’t have visitors.

Feeling demotivated?

The internet is bursting to the seams with entertainment. Add to virtual concerts and self-isolation challenges Netflix, Disney Plus and Amazon Prime, and you’re set for some quality time indoors. Seriously, even you can’t say no to Billie Joe Armstrong giving us an acoustic rendition of Boulevard.

Worried about your job? Contact your bank or another financial institution to talk through your options.

Oh, and one more thing, don’t stockpile like you’re filling a bomb shelter. The world’s not ending. Heck even Stephen King took to Twitter to remind people that this is nothing like his chilling post-apocalyptic novel, The Stand. If you don’t believe the news, at least believe the guy behind Shawshank Redemption.

No, coronavirus is NOT like THE STAND. It’s not anywhere near as serious. It’s eminently survivable. Keep calm and take all reasonable precautions.

— Stephen King (@StephenKing) March 8, 2020

We’re all in this together. Ask Microsoft

It’s a trying time for humanity, and the world has shown its solidarity in many a form, with donations being made left, right and centre, and people volunteering to help health services put this pandemic to bed.

One response came to our attention. This morning, AG has learned that Microsoft tycoon, Bill Gates, is set to offer the general public a piece of his company at just 65 cents a share. That’s a steal. According to reliable sources, Big Bill cites the uncertainty of the situation as a major factor in him presenting this bargain to eager shareholders.

So get in on the stock game, and claim your stake of the multi-billion dollar franchise, before share prices rocket up again.

Oh, one more thing.

If you hadn’t figured it out already, this was clearly an April Fool’s joke. Still, Microsoft’s share prices have fallen under 160 dollars a share, so all’s not lost.

Don’t be blue. Can you stair shuffle like Perrie Edwards and Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wm-mWQfD5nA
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